


lovely

by Ice_Queen784



Series: Devil in Me [8]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Depression, Episode: s03e05 4722 Hours, F/M, Heavy Angst, Season/Series 03
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-12
Updated: 2021-02-12
Packaged: 2021-03-18 12:09:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,448
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29368290
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ice_Queen784/pseuds/Ice_Queen784
Summary: Oh, I hope someday I'll make it out of hereEven if it takes all night or a hundred yearsNeed a place to hide, but I can't find one nearWanna feel alive, outside I can't fight my fear
Relationships: Will Daniels/Jemma Simmons
Series: Devil in Me [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1850731
Kudos: 3





	lovely

**Author's Note:**

> Based on lovely by Billie Eilish & Khalid

_ Thought I found a way _

_ Thought I found a way out  _

_ But you never go away _

_ So I guess I gotta stay now  _

Jemma sat on her cot in the cave, feeling completely hopeless. She and Will were supposed to get off of Maveth today. They had been preparing for weeks for the portal to Earth to open. But they couldn’t get across the canyon to the portal before it closed. They were stuck. 

She had always maintained hope that she would get back to Earth. That she would get back to her home. Back to her team. Back to her family. But reality had come crashing down on her today. And the loss of that hope was devastating. But at least she didn’t have to go through it alone. 

_ Oh, I hope someday I’ll make it out of here _

_ Even if it takes all night or a hundred years _

_ Need a place to hide, but I can’t find one near _

_ Wanna feel alive, outside I can’t fight my fear  _

Jemma walked over to Will, who was sitting by the fire cooking their dinner. She had thought she’d eaten her last meal of moss and pond monster, but she’d been sadly mistaken. 

“How are you feeling?” He asked as she sat down beside him.

“Homesick. Hopeless. Depressed.” She started to cry. “It’s hard to accept that I’m never going to see my friends and family again. That I’m never going home.”

“We’ll just have to find a way to make this our home now.” Will replied, putting his arm around her. “Even if it is literally hell.”

She leaned her head on his shoulder and he planted a kiss in her hair. Even though a small part of her still hoped there was a way to get off this planet, she knew he was right. This cave was her home now. And she needed to learn to live with that. To make peace with it. Because it didn’t matter if she spent a hundred years devising another escape plan. She would never make it out. 

_ Isn’t it lovely, all alone _

_ Heart made of glass, my mind of stone _

_ Tear me to pieces, skin to bone _

_ Hello, welcome home  _

Jemma was walking alone near the pond, collecting moss from rocks for dinner. Days had passed. She wasn’t sure how many. She’d stopped keeping track. Earth days didn’t matter anymore. She was stuck on Maveth for the rest of her life. And a day on this planet lasted 18 years. 

Suddenly, she felt a gust of wind blowing dust around her. She looked up to see a sandstorm coming towards her. Fear instantly rose up inside her. Sandstorms always heralded the arrival of It. She could see It’s shadow in the distance, and she found herself paralyzed.

For a moment, she considered just standing there. Finally letting It kill her. Letting It bring this months long nightmare to an end. It could tear her to pieces and do what It pleased with what remained of her. Nothing mattered anymore.

Except that something still did matter. Someone still mattered. And the thought of Will in the cave, anxiously waiting for her to return, was what finally got her feet moving. She couldn’t die. She couldn’t leave him alone here. She was all he had. And she loved him. 

When she finally made it back to the cave and shut the cover, she ran to Will and hugged him. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close. She let out a breath to try and calm herself. She was home now. She was safe. 

“Did you see It?” Jemma nodded. “Are you hurt?”

“No.” She replied. “Just a little shaken up.”

“I’m glad you’re alright.” He tilted her chin up to kiss her. 

“Me too.”

_ Walking out of time _

_ Looking for a better place _

_ Something’s on my mind _

_ Always in my headspace  _

Jemma walked through the dark desert with Will. They were scouting the best spot to watch the sunrise that was coming in a few days according to her calculations. She’d gotten so used to the constant darkness that she’d almost forgotten what sunlight felt like. It was going to be amazing to feel it again, even if it would only last for a few minutes. 

Will stopped them at a spot along the ridge, overlooking the wide open desert, with nothing to block the view of the eastern sky.

“How about here?” He asked. 

“It’s perfect.” She remarked, leaning in to kiss him. 

“It’s gonna be weird to see the sun again after so long.” 

“It is.” Jemma agreed with a sigh. 

“Is something wrong?”

“We should’ve seen several sunrises by now.” She pointed out. “We should be back on Earth, where we have sunlight everyday.”

“I know.” He replied. “Even after all these years, not a day goes by when I don’t think about Earth and wish I was there. But having you here with me helps.”

“I don’t think I could survive here without you.” 

“I think you could.” He told her. “But you won’t have to.”

“I hope not. You’re the only thing that makes living in hell tolerable.”

“I could say the same thing about you.”

_ But I know someday I’ll make it out of here _

_ Even if it takes all night or a hundred years _

_ Need a place to hide, but I can’t find one near _

_ Wanna feel alive, outside I can’t fight my fear  _

Jemma sat on the ridge with Will, drinking some seriously terrible alcohol while they waited for the sun to rise. They wouldn’t see the sun again for 18 years, so they had to savor every moment of this. 

Suddenly, she saw a flare shoot off in the distance.

“It’s Fitz!” She realized, standing up. “He found a way, we’re going home!”

She ran in the direction of the flare, and Will ran after her. But as they got closer, they heard a familiar rumble of wind coming towards them. 

“Jemma, stop.” Will called. “Get back here.”

“Oh no, not now.” 

“Jemma, go, you can make it.” He told her, taking out his gun. 

“I’m not going without you.” She replied. 

The wind picked up, blowing dust in her face, and she lost sight of him. Then, the dust cleared a bit, and she saw an astronaut standing there.

“Will!” She called. “It’s not Fitz, it’s one of yours. They came for you!”

“Jemma, run!” He called back. “It’s not what you think it is.”

“It’s okay!” She replied. “We’re going home!”

“Don’t trust it.” He insisted. “It’ll do anything to fool you.”

Realization hit her like a ton of bricks.

“Oh god. It’s here!” She yelled.

A hand touched her shoulder, and she turned to see Will standing next to her.

“Jemma, look at me.” He told her. “Run. Go. You can make it.”

Before she could argue, he was pushing her away. She called out his name, but his only reply was to tell her to go. Then, she heard a gunshot.

“Will!” She cried.

“Jemma!” A voice answered. But it wasn’t Will. It was Fitz.

She made her way towards his voice. She kept hoping Will would catch up to her, but he never did. Instead, Fitz pulled her through the portal, leaving Will stranded on Maveth alone. 

_ Isn’t it lovely, all alone _

_ Heart made of glass, my mind of stone _

_ Tear me to pieces, skin to bone _

_ Hello, welcome home _

_ Hello, welcome home  _

Jemma stood in the shower, tears streaming down her face. She was back on Earth, at the Playground. She had made it home. But it didn’t feel like home anymore. After spending six months stranded on an alien planet, she should be overjoyed to be back. But she wasn’t. She was miserable.

All she could think about was getting back to Will. Saving him from Maveth. She couldn’t be sure he was even still alive, but she desperately hoped he was. She didn’t think she could live with the guilt if he had died saving her. 

She turned off the water and stepped out of the shower. After she dried off and got dressed, she walked down to the lab to examine the research that had been done on the Monolith so she could figure out how to put it back together. Everyone on the base looked at her differently now. She wasn’t the same woman she had been before and they all knew it. Maveth had broken her. And the person who could put her back together was still there. She didn’t care if no one else understood. She would get Will back if it was the last thing she did. 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed that. I'll have more in this series soonish. Thanks for reading! :)


End file.
